The Challenge is the POINT

The past four weeks have been trying for me physically, mentally, and emotionally.  Detoxing from coffee, sugar, and eventually nicotine all really turned me into a crazy lady.  You think that what you are doing is just physical, but you can really begin to learn just how deeply these dependencies are imbedded into your WHOLE self, when you let them go.  Not only was I physically detoxing, but there was a ton of emotional (for lack of a better word) CRAP coming out as well.  Fits of anger, irrationality,(Kimmy-Kra-Kra)  and sadness, (I'm talking the UGLY cries here people).  Accompany this with the universe  presenting me with opportunities to grow (read, really super shitty things happening), I am surprised and amazed at my own fortitude. For example, my car broke down after a beautiful morning hike and I was stranded at the bottom of the mountain with my one year old for two hours as it started to heat up to 95 degrees in AZ, I got into a whopper of a fight with my sister, and came down with the worst case of food poisoning I tihnk any person has ever had on the face of the planet , EVER.  All of this while trying to be supermom, and superwife, and practice, AND not cheat on my challenge.  Sounds impossibe, but, I did it.  

 Why?  Why did I do this challenge? .  First of all, because I wanted to see if I could.  I wanted to see if I was strong enough to resist temptation to achieve a goal I had set  for myself.  I WAS srong enough, I AM strong enough, I did it, and am continuing til its done.

I also wanted to see how differently I would feel if I cut coffee, alcohol, grains, and sugar from my diet.  ( A reminder here, I was allready almost completely Paleo, no grains, ever, except at cheat meals.)  Truth be told, I felt pretty crappy at first.  But now that its been almost four weeks for coffee, sugar, and alcohol, and two for nicotine, I am feeling more energized, alert, and focused. The quality of my sleep has improved, allowing me to get a better night's rest.  This makes me a much happier and productive person everyday.  My skin got pretty icky the first two weeks, but has cleared up and feels great now.  My hair is thicker and has more body.   I have lost about six pounds and my body is leaner and stronger.  

Also, I wanted to see what I could learn from this experience.  Which of my vices has the strongest hold, what do I miss the most and why?  The obvious and very easy answer to this question is alcohol.  I used to be a "party girl" and drink quite a bit, all of the time.  Now I am almost 31, a mom, and committed to living the most fulfilling life possble.  My life doesn't have the time or space in it for wild nights out or the shitty hangovers that come the next day.   But I do enjoy a glass of wine after the kids have gone to sleep, or sangria with my lova on his night off, or drinks with the girls from time to time.   Because of this challenge, I have really let go of the some of the stories I was telling myself about alcohol and the role it played in my ability to have fun and unwind.  Its just not necessary.  Also, drinking has always been a huge bitchslap to the face of my quest to be cigarette free.  I used to say I would only smoke when I drank, and then go get a bottle of wine just so I could smoke.  Ridiculous!!    My perspective has totally shifted.  I know if I have more than two glasses of wine, I will smoke.  Being a non-smoker is so much more important than catching an alcohol buzz to me.  So, I have to be very moderate and careful in the future, around alcohol.  One or two drink limit, that's what I've got.  Lesson learned.

I wanted to see if this challenge would change my diet for good and how?  To begin, my salads are getting a makeover, they will be lightly dressed, no more salad soup.
I am giving up dairy on the daily.  When I go back to 90/10 I may include dairy in a cheat meal if I am really aching for something cheesy or creamy.
Also, I will not be drinking coffee daily.  I am going have a one cup a week standard for myself.  I really flipping love coffee, and think it is worth the crazy caffeine buzz to enjoy a delicious brew once a week.

Last but certainly not least, I am officially a non-smoker!!  Cigarettes are my bitch!!  They used to own me.  Now I have no room for them in my life. Goodbye, cravings.  Adios, stinkiness.  Au revoir, feelings of shame and guilt.  Hello, money being saved!!  Ola, leading by example for my children!  Bonjour, walking the freakin walk!!  Two weeks and counting!! 

A friend of mine asked me this weekend, "But what's the point of doing this challenge?  Isn't it supposed to change something about your life, or do you just go back to the old ways when you're done?" This challenge enabled me to shed some pretty  unhealthy habits and also create some positive new ways of existing, which in my opinion is bad ass.  The Challenge is stepping outside of your comfort zone into unfamiliar territory.  The Challenge is making a promise to yourself and loving yourself enough to remain honest and consistent with that promise.  The Challenge is choosing to do something you've never done before, and never thought you could do before.  Why?  Why not?   THE CHALLENGE IS THE POINT.

"The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy. "  Martin Luther King Jr.